Happy Holidays.

Much like every holiday while the rest of the world is celebrating, I'm fuckin' working. So here a couple of videos for y'all to check out while enjoy the festivities.

The Canadian Dream.

In an effort to further homegrown Canadian artists, it seems, and maybe I’m the only one, that we are sitting through some of the worst talent this vast country has to offer. Perhaps it’s because, as I said, anyone can be a musician these days - or maybe it because we need so much Canadian content for big brother’s quotas that we need to keep producing this half assed attempt at good music. In doing so we’ve compromised the stamina of, not only our patience but, the music itself. Jully Black, Simple Plan or Lights would be my prime examples. With entertainers and songwriter like that, the standards to become an actual epic, long lasting band, have dropped dramatically.

I mean, I’m sure I’m wrong but, if you ask most citizens who the best Canadian acts are, typically, would imagine, the answer would be Neil Young, Burton Cummings, Rush, Paul Anka – and those cats are all dynamite, but since them it’s hard to say who could really compare or even succeed them. If you ask critics, they’ll say the Arcade Fire or, you know, Celine Dion or something. So here’s a couple good mainstream albums that might have just got lost in shuffle of all the other awful Canadian acts we’re forced to swallow.

Matthew Good Band – Underdogs (1997)
Maybe you had to be there to truly appreciate this one. To me this was the Canadian answer to the Foo Fighters, Color and the Shape album. It’s what rock and roll music - especially at that time - was missing. As pop music took over the airwaves as well as Muchmusic, Matthew Good Band put out a record that was straight up, rock n’ roll. With lyrics like this from Middle Class Gangsters: “Well everybody up and down my block, they used to matter when we used to rock.” Awesome.

Matthew Good Band >> Rico.
http://www.mediafire.com/?13nztwyjkw1

Sam Roberts Band – We Were Born In a Flame (2004)
This is the quite possibly one of the best folk rock (but more rock than folk), I’ve ever heard. It’s bathing in such positivity you can’t help but we happy and know everything’s going to be alright.

Sam Roberts Band >> the Canadian Dream.
http://www.mediafire.com/?ynm5njjnxnn

Death From Above 1979 – You’re a Woman, I’m a Machine (2004)
Clearly. This album started the electroclash movement. So ... thanks boys.

DFA 1979 >> Blood on our Hands.
http://www.mediafire.com/?zejwdywzgzz

Bryan Adams – Reckless (1984)
Okay, I guess this is what one might consider to be a guilty pleasure; but I don’t feel bad about it … I can’t help it, he just makes you wanna romance somebody - and that is straight from the heart.

Bryan Adams >> (Fuckin') Run to You.
http://www.mediafire.com/?jdmmnxfmhzt

Thunderheist – Thunderheist. (2009)
I’ve been waiting two years for this one and it was well worth the wait. As a side note, if you ever get chance to see these cats live, go. They surely do know how to rock a party.

Thunderheist >> Sweet 16.
http://www.mediafire.com/?ndtwqjc5vnn

bad cover version of a blog.

With the state of world right now too many things have become far too cumbersome to bear. Global famine, the Middle East, the dawning of yet another recession, and even more current, the initiation to divide the Antarctic between surrounding countries. With these problems and so many more surrounding our everyday lives, the media has given us one desperate escape we truly need … the massacre of all the art forms we've grown to love with their incessant remakes. Arguably the worst of these 'revisions' is the cover song.

A cover song is about the fashion equivalent to a pleather jacket; they're easy to acquire, they look good to the average man and even the person wearing it knows how bad it is, but just hope nobody says anything – in other words they're about as entertaining as a Dane Cook punchline. However, there are quite a few covers that are well done. Sometimes too well done.

From a live aspect, cover tracks are great. Going to see an act that covers a tune well is exciting, and an unexpected change from the set you've prepared yourself to hear - but to release a cover track for capital gain as a single, that's just sad. That has about the same integrity as an AIG exec. But I don’t want to talk about those just yet - that's the next installment. So here's a look at some of the worst trash the dreaded cover track has to offer. Some I’ve missed, some I may be too harsh or too dumb but either way here you are. (In no particular order)

Celine Dion & Anastasia >> You Shook Me All Night Long (AC/DC)
Obviously.

Counting Crows >> Big Yellow Taxi (Joni Mitchell)
I’m unsure what goes on at a band meeting when someone actually would suggest remaking an already shitty Joni Mitchell tune. That’s like the guy who shows up at the office and says ‘Listen, I’ve got this million dollar idea, they’re called shrimp flavored potato chips and they taste exactly how they sound!” And that, my friends, is the very definition of ‘the end of your rope’.

Limp Bizkit >> Behind Blue Eyes (the Who)
Haha. We saw them play this track while opening for Metallica at the Skydome years ago. Fred Durst put down the flamethrower he was carrying (no kidding) and started crooning the ladies in the audience by climbing into the stands. It was awesomely funny.

John Mayer >> Kid A (Radiohead)
That John Mayer is just a little sweetheart to any soccer mom that will listen .. oh wait, every soccer mom listens to John Mayer - Anyway, listen John, someone should have mentioned it before, Radiohead doesn’t even pick up chicks with that tune. Better late than never though.

Madonna >> American Pie (Don McLean)
Dear Madonna, this shit wouldn’t fly when you were awesome in the 80s, it ain’t going to work now.

Hilary Duff >> My Generation (the Who)
Your generation is pre-teens Hilary and lucky for you, they don’t yet understand you’re brutal.

Presidents of the U.S.A. >> Video Killed the Radio Star (the Buggles)
We all owned a copy of the bands debut album but for their follow up (entitled II) the first single was this terrible cover of an already terrible song … and now they all sell peaches from a can (in a factory downtown).

Sheryl Crow >> Sweet Child O’ Mine (Guns N’ Roses)
This weasel was nominated for a grammy after covering this song. So later she would opt to next destroy Cat Stevens 1967 hit, “the First Cut is the Deepest”. In an ironic twist, more recently, Crow is pushing forth a motion to congress demanding that she and other musicians collect royalties whenever their songs are played on the radio and other sources. Luckily for her, I’m sure Yusuf Islam doesn’t care too much about her cashing in on his tunes. Axel on the other hand …

Coheed and Cambria >> Sister Christian (Night Ranger)
Maybe I’m a little harsh on this one because, um … Coheed and Cambria are terrible – yeah, I said it and it had to be said.

Aerosmith >> Come Together (the Beatles)
I’ve vented about this track for the last 15 years of my life. I don’t have anything more to say about it.

Marilyn Manson >> Personal Jesus (Depeche Mode)
Manson first got his big break remaking the 1983 tune “Sweet Dreams” by the Eurythmics, so naturally in 2004 when his career starts to hit the skids, he goes back to the safe bet – butchering a classic.

The Ataris >> Boys of Summer (Don Henley)
To remake and awful song to begin with, you’ve already doomed yourself to failure, oh yeah and you’re the Ataris, so you’re already doomed for failure.

DJ Sammy >> Heaven (Bryan Adams)
Nobody can remake a B.A. tune. Nobody.

Mike and the Flower Pops >> Wonderwall (Oasis)
Mike and his flower pops absolutely stripped the song of all emotion and passion, they made it into a campy 50’s style love ballad - which might have worked a bit better if the Oasis version wasn’t still of the charts.

I’m going to group these ones together because, I just get so angry at how bad these tracks are I can’t type .. and what little wit I have I already used up. So let’s just leave it at they’re dogshit:

Goo Goo Dolls >> Give a Little Bit (Supertramp)
Ozzy Osborne >> Rocky Mountain Way (Joe Walsh)
Evanscence >> Heart Shaped Box (Nirvana)

* hip hop remix is a hard one to classify. They may reuse the same hook but rarely use the same lyrics – but believe me there are a ridiculous amount of terrible remix/cover tracks in hip hop (ie. Puff Daddy covering Kashmir by Led Zeppelin and any Kanye West song past 2001.). That’ll have to be a segment in it self.

the Introduction.

Thanks to the glory of the world wide web and technology, everyone now has an opinion on everything. Anyone can become a digital photographer, a recording artist and an expert on everything from celebrities to politics to nutrition. So I figure I'd might as well get a say - It doesn't mean I know what I'm talking about but, it's worth a try.